Daughter

Living Intentionally During the Holiday Season

| TeaKisses

As I write this I am filled with the kind of nervousness that I get before I start a long journey. I am choosing to log out of all of my social media tonight and stay logged out until January 1st, 2014. Now I know that does not seem like a large amount of time to be doing something. but the way I’m thinking about it is that this is more of a test run of the kind of life I want to live. I am very excited with where this will take me and the things that I will learn about myself and the people around me.

Over the past couple of months I have done a lot of thinking about the way I am living my life and how I want to live differently. I have been talking a lot with one of my closest friends about this, one of the things that always comes up is how we as society are so incredibly discontent. This is something that I really relate to, when I’m doing something with friends or with other people I often feel the need to check my phone or message someone. Why can’t I just be happy with what I am doing and the people I am spending time with. With trying to rid myself of all of my social media I am hoping to be able to lengthen my attention span and pay more attention to what is going on around me and the people in my life. I decided to do this a couple of days ago and I gave myself until Sunday to tie up loose ends. So here I am on the eve of my adventure into a “social-media-free Narnia”. I hope that those of you who choose to join me in this adventure gain something from my experience.

As a part of this I am also trying to read more and so I have cracked open Victor Hugo’s Les Miserables. I am also trying to make God a more intentional part of my life and to aid in this I am working my way through a devotional book.

A lot of people are asking me if blogging counts as social media. To this I am responding that the only reason I am blogging is so that people know what is going on in my life and can follow along if they choose. I will not be responding to messages or comments on here, I also do not follow any other blogs so I am not using this as a secret form of social media.

Some people are also worried about finding out what kind of tea I got in my advent calendar. If you are that concerned I think that maybe you should re-think some priorities and start paying more attention to your own life instead of mine. But if you really must know what the tea of the day is, I will be posting a picture of the tea of the day with my blog post. I will try to post every evening before I go to bed.

If you do want to get a hold of me send me an email at beth.c.epp@gmail.com. I’d love to stay in contact with you that way, but once again I will only be responding to those in the evenings.

Thank you to everyone who is reading this blog, it makes me smile that someone out there cares about what I have to say. God bless you. I ask for your prayers so that I can continue to focus on God and what really matters in my life.

As I embark on this journey of living intentionally and learning how to pay attention I pray that I will be able to see God in new ways and that my relationships with those around me will flourish.

Short Story

| TeaKisses

I’ve been dabbling in writing some short stories, thought I might as well post one here and see what you all think.

Here it is:

Supper Is Ready

I have always liked the feeling of my hair when it is wet, cold and heavy resting on my back like a blanket.  When the water is trapped between each strand as if caught in a spider’s web.
“Clare” I hear Mama call me from the front porch of the cabin. “Get in here and help me bathe the twins.”
I clamber out of the lake, twist my hair into a bun at the nape of my neck and wrap myself in my towel.
“Coming Mama,” I call back and run up the sandy path to the cabin. I hop up the steps leaving wet, sand rimmed footprints on the worn wood. Going through the door I see is the twins completely naked chasing each other around the rocking chair in the living room.
Charlie and Terrance are the youngest of the bunch and at seven years old they are a handful. Next is Rose who is 10, Emily is 13, Edward is 16 and I’m 18. The dreaded 18. Turning 18 means that I need to seriously think about finding a husband and moving out of the house, it is the age where I become more of a burden than a blessing. Don’t get me wrong, my parents love me, but since father was diagnosed with cancer we have been a little tight on money.
 “Okay you two, its bath time” I grab the twins around their waists and pick them up.
“Clare” they squeak in unison and continue to giggle as we ascend the stairs.
Getting to the top of the stairs I drop them on the worn rug and shoo them into the bathroom.
“Thanks Clare, now could you go check on the bread in the oven? I think it should be done by now.” Mother chuckles and scoops up the boys and plops them in the bathtub.
“Yes Mama,” I respond and turn to go back down the stairs.
“Oh, and make sure all the kids are inside and washed up for dinner at eight.”
As I descend the stairs I think about what it would be like to be a mother. Would I be good at it? I like kids but I don’t know if I’d want to raise any of my own.
“Clare can we go jump in the lake before supper? “ Emily runs up to me, her rosy cheeks and curly brown hair are highlighted by the glint in her eyes. I see Rose peek around Emily, she is very shy and doesn’t like to ask for anything. Rose follows Emily around like a little duckling; feeding off of her boldness, they are inseparable.
“Go ahead, but make sure Mama doesn’t find out, and you better be back in here and washed up by eight.”
“Ummm” Emily scrunches her eyebrows trying to figure out how long that is from now, “What time is it now?”
“You have 45 minutes”
“Okay, thanks Clare!” Emily turns and runs out the front door.
Rose quickly follows behind, her smile beaming like the sun. I know I shouldn’t have my favourites but I do, I can’t help it. Rose is so sweet and innocent, I can’t help but feeling like she is too good for the world we live in.
I pull the bread out of the oven and set it on the counter, it is perfect like always. Mama has always been an incredible baker. Before we moved out to the lake, people from town would always ask Mama to make cakes for them. We moved here three years ago, right after Papa was diagnosed. The doctor said that more fresh air would be good for him. However, with the fresh air came the wildlife and with the wildlife came Papa’s passion for hunting. He was always out in the shed fixing a gun or cleaning a carcass. Edward was often with him, helping him do some of the things that were becoming more difficult. Papa has been getting worse and worse, he now needs help just to go up and down stairs. That never dampened his spirit though, he was as fiery as ever.
I hear the back door close and Edward’s tall frame and green eyes peek around the corner. His hair is matted down from wearing a hat all day and he has a smudge of grease across his left cheek.
“Supper almost ready?” he asks eying the fresh bread.
“Yeah but you better clean yourself up if you want any”
“Papa is almost done in the shop and he told me to come check out what the screaming was all about.”
“What screaming? I haven’t heard anything”
“We could hear someone screaming from the shop, where are the girls?”
My eyes grow wide, “They’re out by the lake…oh god” I run out of the house and from the porch I can see the silhouette of a little girl at the edge of the lake curled over a small mound on the ground.
“Oh no” I hear Edward gasp as we take off running down the beach towards them, his long legs carry him faster than mine carry me.
As we get closer I see Emily’s brown curly hair framing her tear stained face, she is curled around a towel-covered heap. I don’t want to know what or who is under the towel.
“No!” I scream, I don’t want to let myself think that far. Edward doesn’t let me stay in denial; he yanks the wet towel off of Rose’s limp wet body.
I fall down next to the two girls and hold Rose close to me, trying to feel her heartbeat with my hand, there is nothing. Edward kneels next to me, he has always been more level headed the I am.
“What happened?” his voice wavers.
“I don’t…I don’t …I don…” Emily tries to speak, but can’t get the words out.
“Emily, what happened?” Edward is firmer this time
“She fell off of the rope swing” Emily sniffles, “She didn’t come up and I was worried so I went looking for her but the water was dark and I didn’t know where she was.” Emily sobs into Rose’s body, “When I found her she was like this.”
Edward places his hand firmly on her back.
“It’s not your fault” He reassures her.
Our trans is broken when we hear Mama’s sweet voice call out;
“Supper is ready.”
Word Count: 1076
I hope you enjoyed it, It was a lot of fun to write.